FAQ / Help
Find answers to frequently asked questions. You can also use search to find exact match to your question.
My Membership & Profile
You can do so by clicking on the "Edit Profile" link option in the user dropdown menu (or in the extended toolbar in the mobile version) located on the upper right side of your screen when you're logged in. From there you can open a number of areas regarding your personal information and preferences. Be sure to click the “Update” link at the bottom of each page after you make a change.
You can change your email address by going to the "My Account" option in the user dropdown menu (or in the extended toolbar in the mobile version) located on the upper right side of your screen when you're logged in. From there, click on the "Change E-Mail" link and enter your new email address. Remember to press "Update" after you make the change.
You can change your contact preferences by going to the "My Account" option in the user dropdown menu (or in the extended toolbar in the mobile version) located on the upper right side of your screen when you're logged in. From there, click on the "Messaging Filter" link. Remember to press "Update" after you make changes.
You can change the gender in your profile by going to the "Edit Profile" option in the user dropdown menu (or in the extended toolbar in the mobile version) located on the upper right side of your screen when you're logged in. From there, click on the "My Profile Description" link and select the right option from the drop-down menu. Remember to press "Update" after you make the change.
Some zip codes/postal codes cover more than one city. You can change the city listed in your profile by going to the "Edit Profile" option in the user dropdown menu (or in the extended toolbar on the mobile version) located on the right side of your screen when you're logged in. From there, click on the "My Profile Description" link and select the right option from the drop-down menu. Remember to press "Update" after you make the change.
The basic service is free. As a free basic member, you can create an account, upload your profile and photos, send up to 30 flirts, and search our database for members to see if we have anyone in your area or of interest to you. This is all available before you pay a cent. If you decide that you would like to upgrade, then yes there is a fee.
If your password is not working:
We suggest copying and pasting your password. Please be sure that your browser's cookie settings are no higher than medium-high. Also, try emptying your browser's cookies and temporary files.
If none of these solutions work, or if you simply forgot your password, you can reset it by clicking on “forgot your password?” when you go to sign in on the website. You will be prompted to enter the email address you listed with us. After this step, you will receive an e-mail containing a link that will reset you password. Click on it and type in a new password.
Please be sure to click the Update button at the bottom of each page you complete.
To reactivate your profile account, just log into the site and enter your username and password.
Warning! Paid Premium Members if You Deactivate Your Profile You Will Not Be Able to Access Your Account!
If you want to cancel your FREE Non-Paid account, you can proceed to "Deactivate Account" page
Deactivating your account means that no one will be able to see your profile and you will no longer receive messages from any other members.
There are a number of reasons why something you added to your profile was rejected.
- You used offensive or abusive language
- You didn't fill out the field properly
- You included an email address, phone number or home address (we do not permit this for safety reasons).
In order to best find your match, as well as let your match find you, we ask as much information about your personality and views on life as possible. Think about it this way, if you were going to go on a blind date, you would want to know a bit about the person you're going to go out with... right? This allows us to become the friend who's matching you and your date up, while at the same time giving you thousands of options to pick and choose from.
P.S. Having a photo of yourself (smiling) helps a lot.
To change your password, click on the "My Account" option in the user dropdown menu (or in the extended toolbar in the mobile version) located on the right side of your screen when you're logged in. From there, click on the "Change Password" link.
You will be asked for to choose a new password (which you will need to retype a second time to make sure you didn't make a mistake).
My Photos & Videos
Please check to make sure you image size is bigger than 400x400px and smaller than 600x600px (width&height). Also the file must be a JPG, GIF, PNG or BMP.
If your image meets the above standards and you are still having problems please let us know what browser you are using and what error message you are receiving after your attempt to upload the image.
Once you upload a photo and it has been approved (all photos get processed by a member of our Team, which means we might crop the photo or reject it if it's inappropriate for the site), you can select it to be your main photo.
Go to "My Photos" option in the user dropdown menu (or in the extended toolbar in the mobile version) located on the upper right side of your screen when you're logged in. There you will see your photos. Click on the one you want to use as your Main Profile Photo. You will see the selected photo bigger and the different options underneath. Select "Use this photo as my main profile photo". You will see a square showing only a portion of the photo. You can pull the sides of the square to show as much or as little of the photo selected. Press "Save" on the lower right hand corner of the photo. Then you need to click on the X located on the upper right hand corner of the photo to exit. Your picture then goes to our Team for approval.
Remember that the photo file size must not exceed 5MB, and that all photos are converted to JPG format.There, you will see all the photos that you submitted and that have been already approved. Select the one you want to have as your main profile picture. Click "Use this photo as my profile photo". Remember that the photo size has to be at least 200x200 pixels in order to be used as your profile photo. Also keep in mind that it needs to be a picture of you.
Site Features (Email, Flirt)
You can send messages to any user on the site if you have a full membership. To send a message you must simply click on "Message", located directly below a member's main photo on the left of your screen (when looking at a given member's profile). Enter the subject, the message body and press "Send".
To change email notification settings click here
Please visit the member's profile and click on "Like". It's located below a member's main photo on the left of your screen (when looking at a given member's profile).
Please visit the member's profile and click on "Like". The color of the icon will change and you will successfully remove that member from your Likes. You can also remove a member from your Likes by going to "My Lists". It is located in the menu on the upper right side of your screen when you're logged in. From there, click on the "My Likes" link, select the member you want to remove and click on "Remove" or "Delete Selected".
To block a user from sending you private messages, simply click on "Block". It's located below a member's main photo on the left of your screen (when looking at a given member's profile). Then, you will have the option of adding a comment which will be viewable to you and the member you want to block. Whether you want to post a message or not, you need to press "Submit" to block that member. They will then no longer be able to send you messages.
Any member (basic or full) can send flirts to other users. To send a flirt you simply click on "Flirt", located directly below a member's main photo on the left of your screen (when looking at a given member's profile). You can then choose a flirt from Ice Breakers, Humorous, Passionate or Expressive. Review the selection under each category by clicking on the blue heading. Choose the flirt you want by clicking on it and press "Send".
They are in the inbox, like regular private messages.
Our Chat rooms are plugged into our system from a third party chat room which already has an established membership base that may already have your username/screenname in use. If your current US Chat City username is already taken, we will suggest an alternate username that will only be used inside of the chat areas. We apologize for the inconvenience, but it will not have any affect on your normal site interaction.
Membership and Billing
This is how your charge will appear in your credit card statement: CHATMEM.COM 855-338-5228
We now offer a various selection of pricing options and the ability to accept various foreign currencies for Premium membership. Please log into your account and select Upgrade from the navigation bar to see our current pricing. Note: for your convenience our system will auto re-new your subscription until cancelled. If at any time you want to stop your subscription, please contact our customer support team. Our goal is to keep you as an active happy part of our online community. If you have any questions or concerns, please let us know.
Please check with your card issuing bank to make sure that they are not blocking the transaction or try a different credit card.
On the join form it states, if you do not cancel by the time your trial period ends, your membership will recur to a 30 day membership at after the trial period. We apologize if you missed that on the form. Please let us know if you have any further concerns or are unclear about anything.
Your free membership will allow you to create a profile, upload photos, search for other singles in your area, and receive/send flirts. We are expanding and adding new features all the time.
- Get your profile to show up on the front page.
- Get more visits to your profile page.
- Featured members get 10x more messages.
- Featured Listing displays first and are highlighted in search.
- Featured Icon badge on your profile image.
- Rotated featured big profile on main members page.
- Increase your chances of success considerably.
- Shows other members you are Serious.
To cancel your paid subscription click here or visit www.chatmem.com
Call us at: 954-653-0948
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To view billing history click here
You can reach us via phone at 954-653-0948. You can also contact us via Live chat on chatmem.com or email us through our "Contact us" link at the bottom of the website page. We will be happy to help you with any question you might have.
Yes, at this time we are setup to accept members from every country.
Our site does not install adware. You or someone using your computer visited a site that installed this on your computer. We suggest installing antispyware or antiadware software and scanning your computer for malware.
THE FIRST ONLINE ENCOUNTERS
Be careful about the information you give out. Never supply your last name, outside email address, personal website address, home address, phone number, place of work, or other identifying information in your profile or in your initial emails. If anyone tries to pressure or deceive you into revealing personal information, stop corresponding with them.
AS YOU GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER
Trust your feelings, move cautiously, and choose carefully. As you correspond, be on the lookout for strange behavior or inconsistencies. Ask questions and be sure you are satisfied with the answers. If you think someone is lying, they probably are. Take note of conversation topics. If a person tends to steer the conversation towards unwelcome themes, walk away. Take all the time you need before moving to a more personal relationship.
WHEN THERE'S MUTUAL INTEREST
Photos can help you get a more accurate idea of who someone is. Get pictures of your new friend in different settings at work, at play, etc. Let the other person win your trust gradually. Don't confuse interest with trust. Your new friend should gain your confidence through consistently honorable, forthright behavior. Don't become prematurely personal or intimate with someone. In the desire to find companionship, it is very easy to lead yourself to believe know someone better than you really do, so take your time.
Talking by telephone can give you a better view of your friend's personality, social skills, and character. Call from a pay phone or a phone with Caller ID blocking until there is absolute trust. Listen to the person you are getting to know, and pay close attention to both what they say and what they do. Ask questions and be sure that you are satisfied with the answers.
THINKING ABOUT MEETING IN PERSON
Meet when YOU are ready - do not be pressured into it! Any kind of pressure to meet should be a big red flag to you - do not tolerate it, and don't be afraid to change your mind about meeting. If someone argues about meeting, finds flaws in your thinking, or pressures you, DON'T meet with them. A sensitive person will always understand the risk involved with online dating, and will respect your caution.
Double or group date for your first meeting. Always tell someone where you are going and when you will return, and leave your date's name and phone number with that person. Never have your date pick you up. If you decide mid-date to go somewhere else, drive yourself. Meet in a safe, public place. DO NOT meet in your residence or theirs. Be safe now. There will be time for solitude later.
When meeting outside your area: If you're flying in, make your own transportation and lodging reservations, and keep them to yourself. Don't meet your date at your hotel. If the meeting location chosen seems unsafe or inappropriate to you, go back to your hotel. Always make sure someone knows your plans and has your contact information. If possible, carry a cell phone at all times.
Be concerned if your date never introduces you to colleagues, friends, or family, or if they look very different from photos posted online.
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